[0.0s] Previously, on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
[2.4s] You enter the council chamber and the entire room seems to be erupting in argument and chaos.
[10.6s] You hear much heated discussion about the death or suicide of an aide from Neverwinter,
[17.8s] who had been reported as having hanged himself.
[21.5s] And you arrive at the southern base of the Nether Mountains.
[25.3s] I think we go get on them rocks and go back to wherever we came from.
[31.0s] With your new allies behind you, you take off to the sky taking a circle around the caldera
[37.8s] before you head up into the clouds nodding to the dragons.
[41.2s] You head off in the direction of Waterdeep with new information
[44.2s] and alliances to share with the council.
[46.8s] Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons. We are 5th edition D&D Actual Play podcast,
[57.2s] and I am your dungeon master Russ More, and with me today is Amy More.
[61.4s] Wondering, is that the way we say that?
[64.1s] Yeah.
[64.6s] Okay. Nailed it. Well done.
[66.7s] I'm Amy. I play Thea Mastasia.
[70.2s] And Tom Laird.
[71.6s] Hey, that's me. I play Flint Firebeard.
[74.4s] And Carla Johnson.
[75.8s] And that's me. And I play Nulara Moonbrook.
[78.8s] And also with us today is a super special guest.
[81.8s] He goes way back in my life, back to elementary school.
[87.4s] So this is like a nostalgia episode for me because we get to play together again.
[92.7s] It's good. It's good.
[94.6s] But he's a musician. He does podcasting.
[97.2s] He does broadcasting. This is Spencer Joe, who's joining us today.
[102.2s] Folks.
[102.6s] Yeah.
[107.3s] Nice. That's very nice.
[109.8s] Hi, my name's Spencer and today I'm playing Grug Danger Song, also known as Silver Tusk.
[117.0s] All right.
[118.6s] Guys, Spencer's put a lot of work into his character, so don't feel intimidated.
[123.2s] I do because he's better than us. I already feel intimidated.
[126.2s] That work ethic will not rub off on me. Don't worry about it, Russ.
[130.3s] That's a tall order. I sure better.
[133.0s] Well, you know, half of being a musician is pretending like, you know, what you're doing.
[136.5s] So I'm just going to go with that and tell you that, yes, I did prepare a lot of
[141.7s] stuff for this episode.
[142.9s] High charisma roles, high charisma roles all the way through, right?
[145.9s] Yeah.
[146.7s] First, we got to talk about Patreon.
[148.6s] We're on Patreon, Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
[151.6s] And if you are a patron of ours, we do a random shout out and dedicate an episode to you.
[157.4s] So today, that patron is Jacob Madden.
[161.9s] Jacob, Jacob, you're awesome.
[165.4s] Thank you for being part of Patreon.
[167.0s] And thank you to all of our patrons and to all of our listeners.
[169.6s] Everybody who is part of the community really is just fantastic.
[173.5s] And we love you all.
[174.8s] Agreed.
[175.2s] So much love.
[176.2s] You know what? Let's just jump into the episode.
[178.3s] You know, enough unless anybody's got random odd banter that we usually do off the top.
[182.6s] No, Spencer's here.
[183.3s] We're all too uncomfortable to be.
[185.4s] Super dark.
[186.0s] I feel like we normally are.
[188.3s] Our dog got fixed on the weekend.
[190.3s] Oh, that's nice.
[191.2s] Yeah.
[192.1s] How is she?
[193.6s] Did she jump on something and pull her stitches immediately or is she being well behaved?
[197.7s] She's jumping on everything, but not pulling her stitches.
[200.0s] OK, well that's good.
[201.0s] I bought a human onesie to put on her and it's not long enough
[203.9s] because she has a long hot dog body apparently.
[207.0s] So I couldn't even awkwardly because her cone doesn't fit inside the kennel.
[213.4s] It's really weird.
[214.4s] We had to we let her sleep with us last night.
[217.0s] It was awful.
[218.8s] She's just awful.
[221.0s] It's going to happen again tonight.
[223.7s] Well, good on you for getting her the procedure.
[227.4s] That's right.
[228.1s] Spay and neuter your pets, folks.
[230.3s] This has been Bob Barker.
[232.5s] It's our PSA.
[233.3s] Yo, Bob Barker.
[235.7s] This episode is going to pick up right after.
[238.8s] For us, this is more for us because you guys haven't really played in a while.
[245.0s] This is going to pick up right after the Dragon Council meeting.
[248.2s] So you guys are heading back from that.
[250.6s] And then we will we will find out where Spencer fits into.
[254.9s] We hitched a ride.
[256.0s] No, you've got some rocks, which are big birds.
[260.5s] Yes, not for rocks, rocks or rocks or bad boys.
[267.2s] I only wanted to ride.
[268.1s] Good boys.
[269.1s] Good boy.
[269.6s] Birds, right?
[271.1s] Isn't a rock like a demon or something?
[273.4s] Yeah, exactly.
[274.9s] But a rock is more like a big giant eagle type thing.
[277.9s] It's like a really large Pacific Islander dude.
[280.9s] And he's so charming.
[283.9s] We have talked about the rock way too much on this podcast.
[287.5s] Well, how can you not?
[289.2s] Great sense of humor, that guy.
[290.5s] The dude is magnetic.
[293.4s] I just listened to one of our previous episodes and we went on and on about how
[299.3s] Carla and I just thought he'd just be the greatest guy to hang out with.
[301.9s] And you guys were like, he's got the same dog as you.
[304.1s] And then I had to Google it and his dog had died.
[306.8s] And we were like, we were all crushed.
[313.0s] Hell of a singing voice, a master of bromance also.
[319.0s] Definitely true.
[319.7s] The smoldering looks.
[320.9s] My daughter Nora has watched Moana, the Disney one that he's in.
[325.0s] She's watched it like 300 times.
[326.5s] So I'm well versed in his exploits.
[331.4s] Yeah, exactly.
[332.7s] No, okay.
[333.5s] Now that song's in my head.
[335.5s] So now you're going to integrate it somehow.
[337.7s] That's damn you Lin-Manuel Miranda.
[340.0s] We'll have to talk to Disney about the licensing for that song.
[342.6s] Oh yeah, that'd be dangerous.
[343.4s] We can afford it.
[344.4s] It's fine.
[344.8s] Don't worry about it.
[345.7s] Our lawyers are excellent.
[347.8s] It's just Disney.
[348.4s] They don't own anything really.
[350.4s] They own everything.
[352.8s] To help out with those licensing fees, Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
[356.2s] We're so close to our hundred dollar.
[358.8s] Very close to our our Disney Disney licensing goal,
[362.9s] which is a million dollars by the time this hits the airwaves.
[367.0s] Maybe maybe and we'll be able to license all the Disney.
[370.1s] We are so dang optimistic today.
[372.3s] It's just so optimistic.
[374.5s] Okay, guys, I think Spencer really brings the best.
[379.3s] That's right, Russ.
[380.1s] That's that's nice.
[381.1s] I'd like to think that of myself as well.
[385.4s] Wow.
[386.0s] No, we're all going to be quiet now.
[387.2s] Russ has something important to say.
[390.3s] It's whatever.
[392.3s] Fuck it, guys.
[393.0s] Let's play D&D.
[397.0s] Hey, Tom.
[397.9s] Don't he's going to kill us if you're mean.
[399.6s] I hate Tom.
[400.6s] Yeah, Tom, I don't want to die today.
[402.7s] I know.
[403.1s] I know.
[403.5s] I know.
[403.8s] I'm sorry.
[404.6s] I take it all back.
[406.2s] Grug Silver Tusk is really the mercenary here to murder you all.
[409.3s] Nah, I knew it.
[411.1s] Finally happened.
[412.3s] Level 20.
[413.3s] Here we go.
[413.8s] Oh, shit.
[417.4s] The flight back from the Nether Mountains to Waterdeep
[420.2s] takes you about three to four days flying by rocks,
[423.7s] needing to stop for rest every eight hours or so.
[427.9s] During that time, some things happened.
[433.1s] Flint.
[434.2s] Yes.
[434.6s] What is one encounter or conversation that happened
[439.5s] while you guys were coming back?
[441.6s] When we ran into the company of Gnolls.
[445.1s] Oh, boy, that was a tale.
[448.1s] Yep, that's it.
[449.4s] That's all that happened.
[450.1s] We just ran into them.
[451.1s] It was very, we were very apologetic.
[453.8s] We excused ourselves and we went on our way.
[457.4s] Good.
[457.8s] Nularaaaa, what was another conversation or encounter that happened?
[461.5s] We flew over more dinosaurs and I got so excited
[471.1s] that I almost fell off the rock I was riding
[474.2s] because I'm real into the dinosaurs.
[477.8s] But it was okay.
[478.6s] I was fine.
[481.6s] Maybe it had been warned I was a bit unreliable as a rider.
[485.2s] Hard to say.
[486.4s] I have a question.
[487.3s] Yeah.
[488.1s] How big is a rock?
[489.4s] Is it like one per person?
[491.5s] Yeah.
[491.9s] Yeah, okay, cool.
[494.0s] Well, Nularaaaa and I had races on our rocks.
[498.2s] Rock races?
[499.0s] Yeah, they were rock races and she won most times
[503.0s] but she let me win a couple times,
[504.4s] made me feel good about myself
[505.8s] because she's so much better with animals
[508.9s] and the whole handling of them.
[511.7s] And I do feel like we bonded a lot on the trip
[514.4s] the same kind of way that we did on the train.
[517.8s] Yeah, we're really getting closer as friends.
[522.2s] Flint, not so much.
[523.8s] It's true.
[524.2s] Just kidding, just kidding.
[527.1s] Well, he decided to ride naked for that little one stretch
[530.5s] like he was standing on his rock
[532.7s] just kind of letting the breeze just get all up and everywhere
[536.1s] after that, we rode in silence for a while.
[538.7s] I'm familiar with some of Flint's naked exploits.
[541.6s] It's been a highlight of my listening experience for sure.
[545.8s] Awesome.
[546.8s] Do you like the character arc
[548.1s] how we started as a never nude
[550.0s] and then drifted into always nude?
[552.6s] I think character development is key in a D&D podcast.
[560.2s] So you guys had a lot of fun, obviously.
[562.2s] There were some things that happened.
[564.1s] And you arrive on the fourth day.
[567.8s] Well, you arrive at night.
[569.1s] You land on the air pad at Castle Waterdeep.
[574.5s] It's you, Thaddeus, and Flamikins, of course.
[578.6s] And you guys land and what do you do?
[582.3s] Sorry, where do we land?
[584.6s] You're on kind of where you landed the airship
[587.3s] at Castle Waterdeep where your rooms and stuff are.
[592.5s] It's nighttime?
[593.4s] Like, is it dinner time?
[594.1s] It's nighttime.
[595.6s] Yeah, it's kind of just after dinner time.
[598.3s] So evening hours.
[601.9s] Well, let's eat some food
[602.8s] unless we just had some hard tack on the back of the rocks.
[606.5s] Everybody loves a good hard tack feed.
[608.6s] Yeah, like some pemmican and I don't know, latmus spread.
[613.9s] Thaddeus pipes up and he says,
[615.9s] I've got to go check my plants.
[618.8s] So I'm going to go home
[620.7s] and check in with you guys tomorrow, if that's all right.
[623.4s] Sounds like the classic.
[624.5s] I think I left the stove on.
[626.6s] Totally.
[627.0s] Yeah, yeah.
[627.9s] Hey, how long have we been gone for
[629.8s] and how long has he had those grungs in the tube?
[633.0s] And has he just been carrying those with him?
[635.0s] Yeah, so since you guys left Waterdeep
[639.0s] the last time you've been gone for like a week and a half.
[644.2s] I think I remember Grant's saying
[645.5s] that those things can survive in there for six months.
[648.0s] I think so, too.
[649.6s] It was a pretty long time.
[649.8s] I was concerned about the tiny frogs.
[651.7s] Yeah.
[652.3s] That's fair.
[652.9s] Yeah, bye, Thaddeus.
[654.8s] Thaddeus heads off and Flamingkens is all right.
[656.8s] Let's go get fucked.
[658.9s] Oh, I like where your head's at.
[661.2s] Like fucked up or?
[663.1s] Yeah, I'm a goblin.
[664.4s] I don't know what things mean.
[665.6s] Okay, because it got really blue
[668.7s] pretty fast out of the gate.
[670.5s] I don't know what you're talking about.
[671.7s] When you edit it back,
[672.7s] it's going to sound like I said fucked up.
[674.9s] Okay, perfect.
[675.8s] All right, excellent.
[677.5s] There's a good case that Russ is always right
[680.2s] because he gets to edit the podcast.
[682.9s] Let's go get fucked up.
[684.9s] I like where your head's at, girl.
[686.1s] Let's do it.
[688.0s] So if there's no opposition,
[689.9s] you head out into the street
[691.1s] and you know the area well enough
[694.6s] and you head to what's known as the Yawning Portal Inn,
[699.2s] a stone building with a slate roof as you walk up to it.
[703.2s] The old inn is four stories tall,
[705.8s] offering three floors for guest rooms
[709.5s] and you walk in and it's bustling
[713.7s] and what you don't know about the
[715.4s] or what you might know about the Yawning Portal Inn
[718.3s] is it is most known for being the opening
[721.3s] to the Undermountain.
[722.7s] So right in the center of this,
[724.1s] there is a large hole that goes straight down.
[727.7s] Like a yawning portal?
[730.2s] Exactly, a yawning portal.
[734.4s] You enter and well-worn boards cover the floor
[737.9s] but the immediate impression is of comfort.
[740.5s] Rich blue tapestries decorate the wood paneled walls
[743.6s] of the common room.
[744.8s] You see a bar where an older grizzled looking man
[747.8s] is tending to patrons.
[749.2s] You look around and see an open table
[751.9s] near the back of the room where there's a stage
[755.0s] where you see as you go up to the table,
[758.2s] stepping up, wiping his mouth
[759.9s] after finishing a meal and drink,
[762.1s] picking up his loot, a tall half-orc
[765.0s] with broad square jaw, crooked tusky teeth,
[768.9s] wild autumn hair and a very prominent furrow brow
[772.9s] and he steps up and he begins to play a song.
[788.1s] There once was three heroes
[792.7s] Great power did they wield
[797.5s] Prodigal adventurers
[801.6s] The finest in their field
[806.3s] They stand tall in the midst of it all
[810.9s] Axe, sword and talons
[814.9s] Against overwhelming evil
[819.5s] They'll bring back the bAlydince
[830.1s] They saved us from the darkness
[834.1s] From an army of undead
[839.0s] Drove a dragon from its lair
[843.8s] This all has been said
[849.9s] They stand tall in the face of it all
[853.8s] And they give the people hope
[858.5s] Against those dirty cultists
[862.9s] They'll be the hangman's rope
[865.8s] And the crowd erupts into a huge applause.
[876.9s] At first I was like, it's about us.
[878.4s] And then I was like, no, those people are too cool.
[881.9s] They sound very accomplished.
[884.3s] I hope you can meet those adventurers.
[886.2s] They sound amazing.
[888.0s] We should totally partner with those people,
[889.8s] whoever they are.
[891.3s] I bet they have a cool group name too.
[893.5s] Right?
[893.9s] Yeah, like the...
[896.1s] Just like we do the...
[900.5s] Oh, you're sky-cut out there, Karla.
[904.2s] And we missed it.
[907.2s] It was a brilliant line, though.
[909.3s] That was a brilliant name.
[910.3s] That was an awesome song, Spencer.
[912.4s] Yeah, that was great, Spencer.
[913.5s] That was awesome.
[915.4s] Hey, who is that up there?
[918.6s] I don't know.
[919.1s] I've never seen him before.
[920.7s] Guys, I don't want to be like all braggie and whatnot,
[925.0s] but I think he may have been singing about us.
[929.1s] I don't...
[929.7s] I mean, it sounded like a really...
[932.4s] We did those things.
[933.6s] Like imagine there was a way, way better version of us.
[938.3s] Sounded like that's what he was singing about.
[940.1s] As you guys are having this conversation,
[942.1s] the bartender comes over and lays down three drinks
[944.6s] which you haven't ordered yet and says,
[946.3s] these ones are on the house.
[947.8s] If you need anything else, just let us know.
[949.8s] Hold up.
[950.2s] We never get on the house things.
[951.8s] Is Flamikinskin's losing her shit
[953.6s] because one wasn't put in front of her?
[955.1s] And she's like, what the fuck?
[956.8s] Excuse me, sir.
[958.3s] Could I have a drink?
[959.4s] He's like, oh, sorry, I didn't see you there.
[962.6s] Yeah, I'll be right back with yours.
[964.5s] How is she supposed to get fucked without a drink?
[969.0s] There's three floors of rooms here.
[971.8s] Something's going to happen.
[973.7s] Stop it.
[975.1s] Or don't.
[975.8s] I love it.
[976.5s] It makes me a little uncomfortable,
[978.2s] but I'm also into it.
[981.8s] Hey, was he singing about you guys?
[983.4s] Like, that kind of sounds like you guys.
[985.8s] Hey, you, friend, what's your name?
[989.5s] Me?
[992.9s] Are you speaking to me while I'm up on the stage?
[996.5s] Well, I suppose I should take a break.
[999.0s] I'll come down.
[1000.3s] And he comes down and sits next to,
[1004.8s] it's a goblin, right?
[1006.2s] Yeah, yeah.
[1007.6s] I'm a goblin.
[1009.7s] Hello, goblin.
[1011.0s] You are very small.
[1012.5s] I like you.
[1013.4s] You are very tall, good sir.
[1015.0s] What is your name?
[1017.9s] Well, there are some who call me Silver Tusk
[1021.8s] and others who call me Danger Song.
[1025.3s] But you, my fine green friend, may call me Grug.
[1029.9s] A man of many names.
[1031.2s] My name's Flameykins.
[1032.4s] Nice to meet you.
[1033.9s] Ah, Flameykins.
[1037.4s] It's a flaming good time to meet you.
[1042.5s] I like your style, man.
[1043.8s] Hey, that's a cool song.
[1045.0s] Where'd you learn that one?
[1047.8s] Well, I travel around playing music for my bread.
[1054.9s] And I've been all up and down the Sword Coast
[1057.3s] and I can't remember where I picked it up.
[1059.7s] But lately, the bards have been singing the song a lot.
[1065.2s] And hey, who are your friends?
[1069.1s] They look familiar.
[1071.9s] Well, I mean, they don't speak a lot.
[1077.0s] Well, Thea's looking at the two of them like,
[1079.6s] I feel like there's a spark here.
[1082.6s] I mean, I'm three foot nothing
[1084.3s] and he's like probably seven feet, so.
[1087.1s] Opposite the track, girlfriend.
[1088.5s] That's cute.
[1089.3s] Going to get weird, weird, real quick.
[1091.5s] That's where we're going with this storyline.
[1094.1s] I have a large backpack.
[1095.6s] You may find yourself sitting in.
[1104.3s] If this goes well.
[1106.0s] I'm new Laura Moonbrook.
[1107.5s] It's nice to meet you.
[1108.9s] Hello.
[1109.9s] I'm Thea.
[1110.6s] I'm a Stasia.
[1111.6s] That was a really great song.
[1113.2s] It sounded really familiar.
[1116.6s] And I'm a flint fire beard.
[1118.9s] And yeah, it's a hell of a loop you're playing there.
[1122.6s] Thank you.
[1123.3s] Yes.
[1123.6s] It's my weapon of choice.
[1126.2s] It has no name.
[1127.6s] It's dwarvish.
[1128.6s] Yes, I haven't named it.
[1130.4s] I haven't named my instrument since.
[1133.2s] Well, not since the first one.
[1137.3s] What happened to your first one?
[1138.6s] Oh, gosh, I broke this story.
[1143.0s] Did you like sit on it by accident?
[1144.8s] Was it like a mysterious tale or anything you just broke it?
[1149.5s] Well, you know, being a half orc, I play some kind of shady places sometimes and
[1159.9s] just kind of ended up a big bar brawl.
[1163.6s] Sometimes you got to hit someone with a loot.
[1165.3s] We get it.
[1166.6s] I was lucky.
[1167.9s] You should have seen the other loots.
[1169.4s] I'm imagining like a sword fight with the loots.
[1177.5s] It was a special loot of mine, the first loot I ever got.
[1181.6s] I got it from an elven bard after I ate him.
[1185.8s] Sorry, after you what?
[1187.3s] Ate him.
[1189.1s] She scooches a little further away.
[1193.4s] And then I decided that I don't like the taste of elves and I might as well
[1197.5s] try to survive by playing music instead.
[1202.0s] Well, that's quite the turnaround from eating people to playing music.
[1207.0s] That's fantastic.
[1208.6s] Well, it's very nice to meet you, Grug.
[1211.9s] Grug.
[1212.6s] Grug.
[1213.3s] All right.
[1214.7s] Can we order a drink for Grug?
[1216.5s] Yeah, anyone who sings a song like that deserves a-
[1219.5s] I just do like the old hand in the air point with like the one more and point at Grug.
[1225.6s] Yep.
[1226.2s] Yeah, the bartender who was walking over with Flamikins Kinn's drink stopped
[1234.0s] and hands it to Grug.
[1235.6s] Flamikins Kinn is like, fuck, another one, please.
[1242.8s] Poor girl.
[1243.9s] She just can't get some.
[1245.6s] Well, I have to say I'm really surprised to hear that song and that people are actually
[1255.0s] singing it all over.
[1259.7s] Does anyone know who these amazing adventurers are?
[1266.7s] Well, there are some who have ideas.
[1270.2s] Some much smarter than me may know who these three adventurers are.
[1275.6s] Oh, I think you know.
[1276.4s] But I don't.
[1277.9s] Oh, I think you know.
[1279.2s] Oh, I do?
[1280.2s] I think you do.
[1281.3s] I mean, I know.
[1282.6s] I know them personally.
[1284.6s] They're friends of mine.
[1286.5s] They are now.
[1288.5s] Oh, is it you?
[1289.8s] You're the song.
[1291.1s] No way.
[1292.6s] Oh, it's so cool to meet you.
[1294.6s] Wow.
[1295.8s] You guys, can I see the axe?
[1298.6s] Yeah, Flint pulls his axe off his back and hands it over to Grug.
[1303.7s] Cool axe, man.
[1305.2s] Oh, thank you.
[1306.6s] I don't have a name for it.
[1308.5s] I've never named a weapon before.
[1312.2s] Well, it's one that, you know, the people sing about.
[1317.5s] So it should maybe have a name.
[1320.2s] That's just my thought.
[1321.2s] Anyway, I'll have you.
[1324.8s] I'll take it under advisement.
[1326.2s] How long has it been since you've been been back?
[1329.0s] There's lots, lots to tell people are following you.
[1334.2s] Yeah, like on Twitter or like my insta?
[1339.1s] Well, you know, there's more of an informed debate happening on Twitter.
[1344.1s] I'd say it's more of a like an Instagram thing.
[1347.4s] The people, the people, they speak of you and they're getting together
[1352.5s] and forming resistances in your name.
[1355.8s] Have you not heard of this?
[1357.3s] We have a name?
[1359.8s] I don't know.
[1360.3s] What are they calling us?
[1361.6s] Yeah, what do people call us when they talk about us?
[1364.0s] What do they call us?
[1365.7s] Spencer, they call you.
[1373.3s] Spencer, your Skype call cut out.
[1375.4s] I forced him into this horrible situation.
[1378.2s] We're just going to I'm just full steam ahead, Spencer.
[1380.6s] What do they call us?
[1383.4s] The the not that easy.
[1389.5s] They call you.
[1392.6s] Oh, God.
[1393.9s] Does the bartender arrive to?
[1397.6s] Flaming Kins and friends.
[1401.2s] I remember, I remember.
[1402.6s] I think they call you many things,
[1404.1s] but I've heard most frequently the decimators of dragons.
[1407.8s] Yeah, I like you're going to you're going to save the realm from the cult.
[1415.5s] You've been fighting the cult is what we hear.
[1418.0s] We have been indeed.
[1419.5s] We have certainly try our best.
[1422.2s] Decimators of Dragon sounds like a bit of an oversell,
[1425.5s] but we're going to give it our best shot.
[1429.2s] Have we ever killed one?
[1430.5s] No.
[1430.8s] I mean, we usually just like shake them free of their layers, but they get away.
[1435.3s] We forcefully evict them and make them search for other layers.
[1439.4s] Dragon evicters.
[1441.5s] More of like a renovation.
[1444.6s] We're very modest.
[1446.0s] So resistances.
[1448.2s] That sounds great.
[1450.8s] There's a banner.
[1451.7s] Do you know?
[1452.4s] Have you seen the banner?
[1454.5s] Where have you been?
[1455.4s] You've never heard of any of this, I see.
[1457.4s] Geez.
[1458.7s] Well, I'll show you.
[1460.2s] We were in like a forest for a while and then we've been all over the place.
[1465.3s] Secret lair, you know.
[1467.7s] He reaches into his pack and he pulls up some parchment and a quill
[1472.1s] and he starts sketching out this thing and it shows a sword and an axe crossed.
[1478.0s] And then there's the eyes of an owl.
[1480.2s] He's like, this is your banner.
[1481.7s] You haven't seen this.
[1484.4s] Did you guys approve this design or anybody?
[1488.5s] I'm looking at both of them.
[1489.8s] Yeah, it came by my desk and I okayed it.
[1494.2s] I just put their old rubber stamp on it.
[1496.4s] He says there are militias all over the realm fighting the cult with this banner.
[1502.0s] Since when?
[1505.8s] How long have we been gobbling?
[1506.7s] I don't know.
[1507.1s] Have you heard of this goblin?
[1508.6s] Three weeks?
[1509.6s] Yeah, well, I haven't heard of it.
[1512.5s] I've been stuck with these losers for the last little while.
[1516.0s] Yeah, bartender comes back and hands Flamikins a much smaller drink.
[1521.4s] Bartender, are you familiar with the banner, this banner, and I show him the picture?
[1528.2s] He looks at it.
[1529.0s] He says, yes, that's of the Decimator of Dragons, obviously.
[1536.1s] Right.
[1536.6s] How long's that been going on, would you say?
[1538.6s] I can't really remember.
[1540.2s] The banner, well, there's been like,
[1541.6s] adventures come through here all the time and there's been stories of resistances
[1545.1s] popping up for many weeks now.
[1547.7s] They've just started filtering in within the last couple weeks,
[1551.0s] but they say that it's been going on on the outskirts of where the cult of the dragon
[1555.6s] has been expanding for quite some time.
[1560.5s] And how are these militias doing?
[1563.2s] Are they being successful?
[1564.6s] Are they having victories?
[1566.7s] Mixed successes, mixed successes, depending on where they've come from.
[1574.6s] The deeper you get into cult territory, the less successful they are.
[1580.4s] Well, it's nice to know we're not alone in this.
[1583.9s] I mean, sure, we have some metallic dragons on our side.
[1590.5s] Maybe we should talk to them about switching the names
[1593.4s] since the metallic dragons are on our side.
[1597.4s] That's a good point.
[1598.2s] You don't want to fly that too loud.
[1601.9s] But.
[1603.0s] Draft up a cease and desist order, I think, would be an order there.
[1607.2s] I don't know how I feel about that.
[1608.4s] Innocent people are losing their lives in our name,
[1613.0s] but they should be fighting for what they think is right.
[1617.6s] Name's Dern and I run the joint.
[1620.2s] I forget what the question was.
[1621.8s] Oh, right.
[1622.3s] There wasn't a question.
[1623.1s] You guys and your your relations.
[1627.4s] Yeah, you are a symbol of hope.
[1629.8s] You are driving the cult back wherever you go,
[1633.9s] and the cult seems to be, for lack of a better term, scared of you.
[1639.3s] But Katniss Everdeen.
[1642.5s] And that we are unprepared for what we're about to face.
[1645.9s] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[1647.6s] And a symbol for a bunch of people.
[1649.4s] And yeah, and unprepared.
[1652.3s] The militias that are forming from the opposite side, either people die,
[1657.9s] they concede and are forced to join the cult.
[1661.1s] Oh, that's bad.
[1662.1s] Or they join these militias if they cannot, if they can.
[1665.8s] And then those that cannot fight are sent to here, essentially.
[1672.7s] To Waterdeep, to Baldur's Gate, to Luskin.
[1676.9s] It's like, where are we?
[1678.0s] So you're in Waterdeep.
[1679.8s] So forces are amassing in these major centers.
[1684.6s] Or the weak people are amassing in the major centers.
[1688.0s] Which of it is it?
[1690.3s] Yes.
[1691.2s] Both?
[1691.9s] Both of those.
[1693.4s] I mean, we hope that you and the council working together are amassing forces, no?
[1699.4s] Yeah, we have a plan.
[1701.5s] We have a plan.
[1702.8s] Yes.
[1703.8s] And it's top secret.
[1705.2s] Yeah, we have a top secret plan, but it's really good.
[1708.8s] It's a really good top secret plan.
[1712.3s] Should I roll a bluff check?
[1716.4s] Because I think I have like negative five charms.
[1719.2s] Yeah.
[1721.5s] Sure.
[1722.7s] I mean, he's a little uneasy the fact that you're saying you have a super top secret plan.
[1728.6s] Oh, it's a tremendous plan.
[1729.9s] It's the best plan.
[1730.6s] It's better than anyone else's plan.
[1733.0s] All right.
[1733.5s] Yeah.
[1734.7s] Um, okay.
[1736.7s] Well, yeah, symbol of hope.
[1738.7s] You guys are, you guys are great.
[1741.5s] I won't tell anybody about this conversation we've had because this leads a little,
[1745.5s] leads a little doubt to the story.
[1747.2s] We're just tired.
[1748.3s] Yeah.
[1748.4s] It's been a long journey back from the Never Mountains.
[1751.9s] Were you guys saying that you hang out, you know,
[1757.2s] you're working with the council of Waterdeep?
[1761.1s] Is that what you're, is that what I heard you say?
[1764.7s] Uh, have you not heard the rumors traveling through
[1770.6s] the various cities of the Sword Coast?
[1775.4s] No.
[1776.6s] You've been gone a little while.
[1779.5s] Well, I hate to inform you that they're dying.
[1783.0s] Yeah.
[1783.7s] Yeah, the council or their aides, there's some-
[1787.5s] I'm sorry, you're cutting out.
[1788.8s] Does the council have aides?
[1790.3s] What's happening?
[1791.1s] They died of AIDS?
[1794.4s] That's what I got from that.
[1795.5s] It's a pretty manageable disease nowadays, but-
[1797.8s] Yeah, it's not the death sentence it once was.
[1800.5s] It's-
[1801.1s] I've, I've heard of aides on-
[1805.5s] This is like a, this is like a rank, right?
[1807.5s] Pull the rope cord, pull the rope cord so it can happen.
[1809.3s] This is like a, a rank of, um, so like, uh, would there be counsellors and then
[1815.3s] they have aides, right?
[1816.3s] Yeah, yeah.
[1816.7s] It's like helpers.
[1818.4s] Yeah.
[1818.8s] They are people that aid them.
[1820.7s] Yep. Yeah, I get you.
[1823.7s] Yeah, they're the helpers.
[1825.2s] They're the ones who are dying.
[1827.6s] What's happening to them?
[1829.7s] Some murder, suicides going on.
[1832.7s] Some crazy shit.
[1834.3s] Should probably get to the bottom of that.
[1836.5s] Yeah, that's what I've heard from the other bards.
[1841.4s] My buddy was just gigging in Neverwinter last week and he was telling me this.
[1847.0s] Well, guys, if there's some, if there's some crazy shit afoot, we gotta
[1851.5s] we gotta figure it all out.
[1853.0s] For character knowledge, you remember at the last council, you had heard of a
[1858.6s] single specific suicide from one of the aides from Neverwinter.
[1863.4s] That's what you, the last you had heard of it and you kind of were like-
[1866.9s] Isolated incident.
[1868.3s] He, isolated incident, pressures of the cults of the dragon.
[1871.7s] He was like, whatever.
[1873.0s] But now you're hearing that there are multiple-
[1876.1s] That's usually what people say before they off themselves, whatever.
[1879.7s] Well, that was what you guys said.
[1881.6s] We were weird and insensitive.
[1883.1s] That doesn't sound like us.
[1884.9s] Wait a minute.
[1885.5s] That does sound like us.
[1886.6s] Yeah, that sounds exactly like our brand of compassion and humanity.
[1891.5s] Well, I think we should probably go visit the council and see what's
[1894.7s] what's happening with this.
[1896.3s] It's too weird to be all separate.
[1900.7s] Yeah, it's got to be connected.
[1902.5s] Everybody make a perception check.
[1904.4s] I love rolling dice.
[1905.6s] Oh, I rolled it right off the table and got so excited.
[1907.9s] 15.
[1909.2s] I also rolled a 15, but it's a little more than that because-
[1912.8s] 18.
[1913.6s] I rolled an 11.
[1914.4s] Or no, it's just this, isn't it?
[1916.0s] You have an 8 perception.
[1917.2s] So you got a 23.
[1918.6s] Damn.
[1919.2s] 23.
[1920.1s] Where's my perception?
[1921.5s] Oh, there it is.
[1922.1s] I see it.
[1922.7s] Alphabetical.
[1923.3s] It comes after nature.
[1924.7s] I know my bases.
[1926.6s] 23.
[1928.0s] You hear clear as day, the, well, maybe not clear as day,
[1931.1s] but you hear rumblings kind of through, I guess it's a pretty packed place,
[1934.1s] but you hear a similar kind of story coming from behind you.
[1938.8s] A couple guys talking about how there's been a new murder suicide rumor happening.
[1947.4s] Rumor has it that the latest body was taken to the city morgue.
[1953.4s] So you kind of hear snippets of that from behind you.
[1956.8s] Guys.
[1958.9s] Yep, forgot it was an audio podcast.
[1961.2s] Tom and I both in video, like, raised our eyebrows like,
[1964.4s] yes, friend, please continue.
[1968.0s] That's not how this works.
[1969.6s] Guys, I just overheard behind us that there has been another murder suicide.
[1978.0s] Yeah, you heard the words murder and suicide.
[1980.9s] Murder suicide that happened just recently and the body's been taken here to the morgue.
[1987.2s] We're going to go to the morgue to look at a dead body because we're really good at that.
[1991.2s] Hey, you guys want to see a dead body?
[1993.6s] Sure.
[1995.3s] Yeah, you know, we're so okay.
[1998.7s] Who's who's going to the morgue?
[2001.6s] All of us.
[2002.4s] Let's invite you guys.
[2004.2s] Can I come?
[2005.7s] Yes, absolutely.
[2006.9s] Do we know where the morgue is?
[2008.1s] Because maybe he could show us the way.
[2009.6s] I know dead people.
[2010.9s] Because I believe we've been in water deep,
[2012.4s] but we I don't think we visited the morgue while we were here.
[2015.8s] Well, I happen to have lived in this town for city for
[2020.8s] good, good long while.
[2021.9s] Now I probably could dig the directions to the morgue out of the back of my head.
[2027.0s] Perfect.
[2027.6s] And you don't you don't mind the kind of the morbidity of.
[2032.3s] Yes.
[2034.1s] Oh, I dabble.
[2035.4s] I dabble in morbidity.
[2038.1s] Yeah.
[2038.8s] I mean, he ain't a fucking elf.
[2040.9s] Yeah, let's just.
[2043.8s] He's comfortable around dead bodies.
[2045.6s] We probably need him just for that.
[2047.6s] I survived in the woods for probably a couple of years doing that.
[2052.0s] Yeah.
[2052.4s] Eating elves, eating humans, animals, goblins.
[2060.3s] So you have you have dinner tonight already?
[2062.6s] Yeah.
[2062.9s] Well, as soon as I learned how to play the loot,
[2066.8s] I figured out that it could get me better dinner than
[2069.7s] elves because elves are not that it's not a good taste.
[2074.0s] Kind of tough.
[2075.4s] They're very stringy.
[2076.7s] There's not much meat on this.
[2078.3s] Yeah.
[2078.8s] I never see a fat elf.
[2080.5s] You know, being a half orc, I've been wondering about the teachings of my people.
[2085.4s] You know, growing up in the orc tribe, doing the whole violence thing.
[2090.8s] I'm just like, I don't know about that so much anymore.
[2094.4s] Yeah.
[2095.1s] Yeah, I can relate.
[2096.0s] I want to be a pirate again.
[2099.1s] Cool.
[2099.8s] We'll get you back on a boat.
[2101.1s] We'll get you back there.
[2102.2s] I could sail.
[2103.0s] Yeah, I hear they got airships here, too.
[2105.6s] That would probably be pretty cool.
[2108.0s] Yeah, they fly.
[2108.9s] Airship.
[2110.3s] Yeah.
[2111.5s] All right.
[2112.3s] To the morgue.
[2113.3s] Let's go.
[2117.9s] Hey, how's it going?
[2118.7s] I'm your Dungeon Master Russ More.
[2120.0s] Thank you so much for joining us for episode 43 of Dumbgeons and Dragons
[2123.6s] titled A Friend in the Night Part 1.
[2126.4s] We are so excited Spencer could join us for this episode and next episode.
[2130.8s] That's right.
[2131.5s] There will be two episodes featuring Grug and his musical stylings helping out
[2135.2s] the party as they try to figure out the whole murder-suicide situation in Waterdeep.
[2139.6s] If you want to find more of Spencer's lovely music, you can find them at
[2142.8s] spencerjo.bandcamp.com or on his Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram pages,
[2148.1s] which I'll link in the description.
[2150.0s] If you want to support us directly and you enjoy the show and want to get more,
[2153.8s] the easiest way to do that is to join the Dumb Dragon Cast Patreon community.
[2157.8s] You can visit Patreon.com slash Dumb Dragon Cast and see all the tiers and rewards.
[2162.6s] And in fact, we just did a little revamp of the reward levels.
[2165.9s] So we have more options and more things that you can get in on
[2169.1s] at different levels that can suit your budget.
[2171.2s] And we're super close to our next goal, which when we reach that,
[2174.8s] we'll be doing a great giveaway and adding more content to the community every month,
[2178.5s] like fortnightly character sheets fully fleshed out with backstories for you to take
[2182.9s] and use at your gaming table.
[2184.5s] Every one of the players and myself will be contributing to that
[2187.3s] and are super excited to be able to offer you fun things that you can take away
[2190.7s] from the show and use at your own table.
[2192.8s] Again, Patreon.com slash Dumb Dragon Cast.
[2195.6s] We hope to see you over there.
[2197.3s] All of our social media links can be found at DumbDragons.com.
[2200.9s] So go check out the website and join, follow or like where you can today.
[2205.2s] One final thing.
[2205.9s] Thanks to Sirenscape for some of the amazing atmosphere and music.
[2208.7s] Make sure you check them out at Sirenscape.com to bring your games to life.
[2212.7s] You just gotta be using it at your gaming table.
[2215.1s] Links for everything mentioned today can be found in the description.
[2217.9s] The next episode will be out July 11th, which is only a week away.
[2221.6s] I know I said we'd be back to a regular schedule, but we're trying something out.
[2225.5s] Plus we want to get you that second half of the super fun adventure.
[2228.7s] That's right.
[2229.6s] So that's it.
[2230.4s] Let's dive back in and see what's going on at the morgue.
[2232.6s] Have a great week.
[2233.4s] We'll talk soon.
[2240.3s] We, we pay for the beers that weren't free.
[2243.8s] They were all free.
[2244.6s] Well, they were all free.
[2245.8s] That's nice.
[2246.8s] Okay.
[2247.1s] Well, we high five the bartender.
[2249.1s] That's on our way out.
[2250.2s] Pretty sweet.
[2250.8s] A line of high fives coming out of it.
[2252.5s] Yes.
[2253.2s] Like a softball team kind of thing, everybody running back.
[2257.3s] But like real ones.
[2258.6s] Not those like.
[2259.6s] Yeah, not those.
[2260.4s] Oh, he did that.
[2261.7s] It was so gross.
[2263.1s] Like the limp, clammy hands just going down a line.
[2267.4s] Yeah, no, it's not.
[2269.6s] I mean, we all know it was a good game.
[2271.1s] Anyway, to the morgue.
[2272.2s] We all know it's a cookie.
[2273.8s] Let's go find some limp, clammy hands.
[2277.2s] Well, we're going to the right place.
[2279.2s] Yeah, let's do it.
[2280.4s] I don't know if Rick and Mortis is set in.
[2281.7s] That high five could be tight.
[2283.2s] Oh, that's true.
[2286.0s] Yeah, so.
[2287.9s] Grug, Grug, Grug knows the way to the morgue.
[2290.9s] Pretty handy way.
[2291.9s] We follow him.
[2293.2s] And you get to the morgue and it seems like it's all locked up for the night.
[2299.0s] I don't think that's a problem because I think I have thieves tools.
[2302.3s] I do.
[2303.6s] You do?
[2303.8s] I want to break into here.
[2305.2s] All right.
[2306.0s] I'm going to do it.
[2306.9s] I'm going to pick this lock.
[2308.0s] OK, make a thieves tools check.
[2309.6s] I'm going to innocently whistle while she's doing that.
[2313.9s] Roll, roll, roll an aiding or a helping.
[2318.6s] Is this probably?
[2320.0s] What do I roll for that?
[2322.4s] Well, you're trying to probably distract.
[2324.8s] So is this a dex performance?
[2327.3s] OK, that is a 17.
[2330.8s] Fuck.
[2331.2s] That's some good whistling, my dude.
[2333.2s] 16.
[2335.5s] So plus another two for his helping you.
[2339.0s] Yeah, you managed to it takes you a minute, but you get in it and shimmy the lock open
[2344.3s] and you're inside a dark morgue.
[2348.3s] I produce flame in my hand.
[2351.2s] So that I say I like a banana and a glowing orb comes out guys.
[2361.6s] She says banana to light up the ball.
[2364.8s] I don't know if you caught that there, there, Grug.
[2369.0s] I don't get it.
[2370.5s] Yeah, I know.
[2371.2s] Was that like a safe word?
[2372.4s] No, weird bunch.
[2374.8s] Bunch of bananas.
[2377.0s] All right, let's go find a dead body.
[2380.1s] So we look around.
[2380.8s] What do we see in this morgue?
[2382.4s] Oh, you're going to kind of like the front entryway, like the reception area.
[2386.4s] We have a really hard time getting past reception areas.
[2389.5s] Is there like a desk?
[2390.8s] There's a desk.
[2391.7s] Yeah.
[2392.1s] And then like a room going back.
[2394.4s] Any of these rooms labeled?
[2396.3s] Yeah, one says dead bodies.
[2398.3s] Oh, perfect.
[2398.9s] Let's go look for the one that says dead bodies.
[2403.2s] Really insensitive though, right?
[2404.7s] It is.
[2405.2s] I mean factual.
[2407.1s] Medieval.
[2408.0s] See, the problem is we didn't see the other sign that says
[2411.6s] if you go in this room, you will become and then it says dead bodies.
[2416.4s] Oh, you will become dead bodies?
[2419.0s] Yeah.
[2419.6s] Grammar in that sign killed me.
[2421.8s] It's a sign, Amy.
[2425.8s] OK, so you go into the dead bodies room and there are, in fact,
[2429.0s] two dead bodies laid out on the table.
[2431.7s] And only two?
[2432.2s] Are they covered with the sheets?
[2433.4s] Thank goodness.
[2434.6s] Seemingly only two.
[2435.9s] Are they covered with sheets?
[2437.6s] Do they have toe tags?
[2439.2s] No, no toe tags.
[2441.0s] They're just naked on a tray?
[2442.8s] What's happening?
[2444.4s] Well, no, they have clothes.
[2445.4s] It looks like they were just brought in there.
[2448.0s] Well, no, but usually when they are examined post-mortem,
[2452.7s] they take their clothes off.
[2453.7s] So I'm not just being gross this time.
[2455.8s] I know.
[2456.4s] I've watched CSI.
[2458.0s] Although I also seem to remember Russ going back to somebody
[2461.6s] being naked on a slab numerous times in our Patreon episodes.
[2466.1s] I just listened to that one.
[2467.4s] Actually, it was fairly inappropriate.
[2469.3s] I was uncomfortable as I was listening.
[2470.8s] I was like, no, get away from him.
[2472.5s] Somebody save him from Russ.
[2474.5s] Just trying to create narrative.
[2476.7s] That's all I'm doing.
[2477.7s] Russ's character was a predator.
[2479.3s] A creepo.
[2480.3s] Extraordinary.
[2481.6s] A means to an end.
[2482.8s] The things we do.
[2484.6s] No, this was someone we were rescuing
[2486.3s] that was just tied down on a table.
[2491.8s] I'm gonna have to subscribe for that one.
[2493.7s] You might.
[2495.0s] Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast
[2497.8s] for all your naked guys on slabs.
[2500.6s] So we've got a couple of clothed people on slabs.
[2504.3s] Men?
[2504.8s] Humans?
[2505.6s] Yes, two humans in more or less official attire
[2511.0s] and they look like they are.
[2513.5s] One of them has markings from Waterdeep
[2518.8s] and one has markings from Neverwinter.
[2521.0s] I cast Detect Magic on the bodies.
[2526.9s] Don't see any magic.
[2528.6s] Guys, it wasn't magical.
[2530.5s] Is there obvious...
[2531.6s] Can we tell how they died?
[2533.3s] Is there an arrow sticking out of one in a comical way
[2536.6s] through its head?
[2539.5s] Yeah, exactly.
[2541.0s] One looks like he has his head kind of bludgeoned in.
[2545.1s] I bet that's the murder.
[2546.0s] I'm guessing.
[2546.7s] Yeah.
[2547.2s] The other after some closer...
[2550.4s] Maybe make an investigation check.
[2553.2s] Okie dokie.
[2554.3s] I got a 15.
[2557.2s] Yeah.
[2558.6s] Oh, Jesus.
[2559.8s] Spencer, are you okay?
[2561.9s] Two.
[2565.2s] So Nularaaaia, you're taking a look at the second body
[2568.4s] and you see marks around his neck
[2572.6s] that look to be like he might have hung himself.
[2575.2s] It doesn't look like a hand,
[2576.2s] but it looks like maybe a rope or a sheet of some sort.
[2579.5s] I'm going to speak with that one.
[2582.9s] Sure.
[2583.6s] I cast Speak With Dead.
[2586.9s] Fuck yeah, you do.
[2588.4s] Oh yeah.
[2589.4s] I think it's a ritual, actually.
[2590.8s] So let's see here.
[2592.6s] No, it only takes me one action.
[2594.3s] So I just kind of like...
[2596.3s] Okay.
[2596.8s] Okay, just let's see here.
[2599.0s] Oh, yes.
[2603.8s] The body sits up on the slab.
[2607.3s] Sorry, is this the one that was hung?
[2609.2s] I get five questions.
[2611.0s] Yep.
[2611.7s] Yeah, this is the one that was hung.
[2613.5s] Yes.
[2614.8s] Why did you die?
[2616.9s] I was told to hang myself.
[2621.7s] By whom?
[2622.8s] She does not have a name that I know.
[2628.4s] She compelled me to do what I did, though.
[2631.8s] Sounds like some enchantment bullshit, fellas.
[2635.7s] She sounds like a bitch, a righteous bitch.
[2639.2s] Can we get a physical description of this righteous bitch?
[2642.4s] What did she look like?
[2644.6s] She had long red hair.
[2649.6s] She stood about your height, and he points to Thea.
[2654.6s] She has eyes as black as night, and she wears silk robes.
[2663.2s] Red silk robes.
[2665.6s] Does this sound like anyone that we know?
[2667.8s] I don't think so.
[2670.8s] We've run into some women on the council,
[2672.8s] but if it was a counselor, he would know who she was, right?
[2676.0s] Yeah, she would have a name.
[2677.7s] He also says she is very beautiful.
[2682.2s] All right, I've got two questions left, guys.
[2683.8s] What do you think?
[2684.9s] Do we want to know if, like, she came to him to tell him that,
[2691.6s] or if, like, how he was compelled?
[2694.4s] Does that make sense, like, or was it?
[2696.0s] How did you meet this woman?
[2697.2s] Like, how do you know this woman?
[2699.0s] Yeah.
[2700.5s] How did you come across this woman?
[2704.2s] She came to me, and I found myself drawn to her.
[2713.2s] I was at a tavern in the Field Ward,
[2718.6s] which is an area in Waterdeep for those playing the home game.
[2723.5s] Or this game.
[2724.3s] Or this one.
[2724.9s] This game, yep.
[2726.3s] The place is the Lonely Whip.
[2728.6s] That's the only time I met her there.
[2732.1s] What did that mean?
[2732.8s] He met her somewhere else some other times?
[2735.8s] I guess so.
[2738.3s] Be more clear, corpse.
[2740.2s] The Lonely Whip.
[2742.4s] We have one more question.
[2743.4s] Yeah, like, do we want to know if he...
[2745.5s] Well, no.
[2746.4s] I don't know.
[2747.2s] Anybody?
[2747.8s] Oh, should we do the thing like pushing daisies
[2752.7s] and ask, like, what's one thing that he would like us
[2755.6s] to tell his loved ones, blah, blah, blah?
[2758.7s] That's sweet.
[2760.7s] Sweet as hell added the blah, blah, blah.
[2762.6s] Well, I like any reference to pushing daisies.
[2765.7s] I could go on that.
[2767.0s] You want to go on that?
[2768.2s] Yeah, let's do that.
[2769.7s] I think we have the information we need to pursue this installment.
[2776.8s] I say, corpse, do you have any messages for the living?
[2782.0s] The corpse pauses and says,
[2786.6s] tell my wife I loved her.
[2790.8s] So he's not going to tell us who his wife is?
[2792.7s] Oh, we can probably figure that out.
[2793.9s] It's fine.
[2794.4s] Since he's an aide and...
[2795.3s] Yeah.
[2796.4s] All right.
[2797.7s] And after that question is asked,
[2800.8s] his body lowers back to the slab
[2804.4s] and he is again, but a corpse.
[2807.6s] Hey, Grug, pretty cool trick talking to that corpse.
[2811.4s] Very handy.
[2812.4s] Yeah, I've always wanted to try that one out.
[2814.6s] Well, it's hard to do after you've eaten them.
[2816.6s] It just doesn't seem right.
[2823.6s] Half of them is missing.
[2824.7s] They're like, oh, good God.
[2826.4s] So how is that for you?
[2828.0s] If you were to rate me on Yelp, what would you give?
[2831.1s] I'm going to have to leave a five-star review.
[2835.3s] Would you have preferred not to be eaten?
[2838.8s] I see.
[2839.3s] Yeah, probably.
[2841.7s] Grug, do you know where the lonely whip is?
[2843.5s] Oh, the field ward.
[2846.6s] I know where the field ward is for sure.
[2849.0s] The lonely whip will have to look around.
[2852.0s] Maybe something will jog my memory.
[2854.0s] Y'all want to head over there, look for a red-haired beauty?
[2857.0s] With black eyes, apparently.
[2859.0s] Yeah.
[2859.5s] Like West Borland eyes.
[2863.8s] Is there any file or anything on the desk
[2866.5s] that might give me a hint as to his name
[2868.5s] so that we can track down his wife?
[2870.8s] No, I mean, it looks like the bodies were just brought in,
[2874.4s] so not much has been done with them as of yet.
[2878.7s] Okay, cool.
[2879.6s] Are we able to stop by the council
[2883.4s] and grab a uniform for someone?
[2885.7s] Because if she's targeting people
[2886.9s] that are in these uniforms that are working
[2889.2s] for certain towns or whatever,
[2890.8s] we should probably dress up like one of them?
[2893.1s] I mean, you guys have badges.
[2896.4s] Yeah, you remember?
[2896.9s] Again with the goddamn badges, hey Ross?
[2900.8s] We demanded the badges, I think.
[2901.9s] I give you guys the shit you asked for
[2903.6s] and then you never use it.
[2904.9s] Yeah.
[2905.5s] Well, when have we had to flash a badge?
[2908.3s] I mean, you could flash your badges all over the place, but.
[2911.8s] Could.
[2912.6s] And Flint does.
[2914.0s] Put it on your hat.
[2915.6s] That's a good marking.
[2916.9s] I don't have a hat.
[2918.8s] Oh, do you want one?
[2920.1s] I have one.
[2921.7s] No, I don't think I'm really a hat kind of gal.
[2925.3s] Good.
[2925.6s] Thanks, though.
[2926.5s] I like my hat.
[2927.4s] I'll keep it.
[2928.1s] I take my badge out and I attach it to my the strap of my quiver there.
[2935.6s] Now I'm super official.
[2936.4s] Now, if anyone comes in here, I'll be like, hey, respect the badge.
[2939.6s] And then I'll turn to someone and say, I've always wanted to say that.
[2942.4s] And that's how that interaction will go.
[2944.3s] We don't even have to do it now.
[2945.5s] See, it's done in your head already.
[2947.2s] Yeah, that's fair.
[2948.4s] Yeah, so you guys head to the field ward.
[2952.4s] It takes you probably about an hour to get there.
[2955.8s] You guys talk about anything on your way.
[2957.8s] I turn to Donnie and I say, so when are you going to be a big dragon, Donnie?
[2965.8s] OK, how did we resolve that, though?
[2968.8s] I think you guys decided that it was a choice that Donnie and Nulara could make.
[2973.7s] Am I wrong?
[2974.4s] Oh, I thought I I remember that differently.
[2977.7s] I thought we had decided it would be like basically permanent, but he has to put
[2982.0s] the collar on and maybe he hasn't done that yet.
[2988.0s] Yeah, sure.
[2988.8s] We'll say Donnie hasn't done that yet because we haven't established that there's a gold
[2992.4s] dragon wormling following you guys around.
[2994.6s] Yes, and that would need some explanation, probably.
[2997.2s] He says, well, I mean, whenever she gives me the fucking kala, I'm just going to be
[3002.4s] great. It'd be good.
[3004.1s] And, Grug, you notice a pseudo dragon kind of poke his head out of Nulara's bag.
[3009.2s] Whoa.
[3009.5s] Hello, hey, pseudo dragon, I, I, I, are you doing there?
[3014.8s] I like your accent.
[3015.9s] Are you from Boston?
[3019.3s] I mean, deep in my lineage, I'm sure I am there.
[3023.0s] Uh, most recently, though, I'm from this bag here.
[3028.5s] Hi, I'm Donnie from the bag from this bag.
[3033.2s] All right.
[3033.6s] Are we there yet?
[3035.2s] All right.
[3035.8s] Are we there yet?
[3038.6s] Yeah, let's fucking get there already.
[3040.4s] Jesus.
[3057.7s] Music in today's episode was by Kavin Macleod of incompetent.filmmusic.io.
[3062.4s] Oh, Spencer disappeared.
[3065.1s] Oh, he did.
[3065.9s] Spencer, come back.
[3072.4s] Okay.
[3072.8s] Yeah, bye, Francis.
[3074.4s] Nope, Thaddeus.
[3076.4s] We already said goodbye to him.
[3079.2s] We said a final goodbye to him.
[3082.6s] Or did we?
[3084.3s] See you tomorrow, Thaddeus.
[3085.8s] Wait, it's.
[3089.6s] I don't know where I was going to go with that.
[3090.9s] Okay, so just wait.
[3092.9s] All right.
[3094.4s] I'm going to wait for a minute.
[3095.8s] I had a thought.
[3097.2s] I'm an older man.
[3099.8s] Well, Thaddeus just left, so we need a new older man in the party.
[3103.6s] We can't be without someone.
[3105.4s] It's kind of our thing.
[3106.6s] It's Dumbgeons and Dragons and an old dude.
[3110.5s] And that's you.
[3111.7s] That's me.
[3112.2s] And you're the youngest of us all, so that's cute.
[3115.5s] We just got.
[3119.9s] We just got.
[3121.4s] Oh, just got back.
[3122.4s] Yeah, I think Carlo saying we just flew into town.
[3126.0s] And boy, our arms are tired.
[3129.7s] I wish that's what I said.
[3131.7s] I mean, I had only booked the musician tonight,
[3133.6s] but if you want to get up and do a set, that would be.
[3137.2s] I've got a tight two minutes.
[3138.7s] So let's wait on a tight five.
[3141.6s] A tight two on rock travel.
[3144.9s] Still working on that tight five.
[3146.8s] It's just somebody's basement freezer.
[3148.4s] Why did you put them in air quotes?
[3153.2s] Yeah, it's just somebody's cold storage room.
[3155.5s] Yes, it's a tent.
[3157.5s] It's 10.
[3158.2s] Yeah, it's just a hole.
[3161.4s] Tom Cruise risky business kind of morgue.
[3164.2s] Yeah, exactly.
[3165.4s] I think they were operating a brothel over there,
[3167.2s] so it would have been an air quotes morgue.
[3170.8s] Let's go have some fun at the morgue.
[3174.9s] Someone's knocking on my door, you guys.
[3176.4s] I'm really sorry, but it must be the owner of the place.
[3178.5s] Someone's knocking on your door.
[3180.7s] We'll be waiting for you.
[3182.9s] She's at a cabin in the woods.
[3184.3s] It's not good.
[3184.8s] Come on, open the door.
[3187.7s] Keep the live stream going, guys.
[3190.9s] Why did you do what you did?
[3194.0s] Do you have to be more specific?
[3195.1s] Ask him why he killed himself and that other guy.
[3198.8s] I can see Rats being like, I did a lot of things.
[3202.7s] Well, last time we had to ask a question.
[3204.0s] You mean kiss my wife's sister?
[3206.3s] I don't know.
[3207.7s] Oh, I hate that scene.
[3208.8s] That's what you're talking about.
[3210.8s] That was edited perfectly.
[3216.8s] None of my jokes are good enough.
[3218.0s] I have to keep it for now.
[3220.6s] I was trying so hard.
[3222.0s] Like, keep them holstered.
[3224.0s] Nothing.
[3225.2s] I was looking at a list of names.
[3226.7s] I was like, no, too easy a joke, too easy a joke.
[3229.6s] I'm going to make them work for it.
[3231.2s] I'll get there.
[3231.8s] I'll get there.
[3232.7s] 100%.
[3233.5s] I thought Russ was going to start reeling off that
[3235.8s] don't forget to wear sunscreen thing from like,
[3238.6s] remember like 2001?
[3239.4s] Like the boss lerman thing?
[3240.7s] Yes.
[3241.2s] Oh, yeah.
[3241.8s] Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.